Happy New Day! I just started the morning off with a run and then crossed the river to get back into Zen Village.

It was an interesting journey that takes me over a little rickety walking bridge I seldom use.

I have been navigating these two very strong connections I have with Alexandria and Emma. Emma has thankfully and conveniently relocated a short run away from Zen Village and Alexandria and I have been having very open communication about desires and what embodiment of that desire looks like.

Yesterday Emma came over and voiced her anger at my seeming lack of shared desire.. I expressed it’s actually a mutual desire to spend quality time together alone, and she was angry that I was seemingly not caring to make that happen.

Last night Alexandria gave me one of the most beautiful healing sessions and guided affirmations for my heart and this morning I woke up feeling lighter and like I honestly wanted to see Emma.

I felt like I had to really break through some fear to voice that to Alexandria especially after our beautiful night and sleep together. And our realizations around sexual desires that hasn’t always been expressed in the healthiest of ways.

But I shared about an hour this morning with Emma, beautifully in the sunshine. We cuddled, kisses and caressed and were careful not to cross any lines that felt like it might be too much at this time.

I left her with a deep sense of aliveness, a turned on feeling about life in general and ran back. Jumped in the river, got dressed and now find myself sitting in the sunshine surrounded by the cats and dogs here that love to hang out together in the sunshine.

In short we explored our desires with innocence and respect, it felt so good to be disciplined in THAT way rather than repress desire in general or cut things off because I couldn’t handle the energy. Or because it’s easy to be trusted completely cut off from temptation.

I broke through fears in order to explore. And I am willing to allow spaciousness for all to do the same things and work through my own fears and jealousies.

I share this story so that one may be inspired to see see that there is not just one right way to relate.

We must live in the freedom of our truth, but with love, respect and sensitivity. We must discern moment by moment what is truly caring for another’s heart and not be afraid to lose each other when carrying out our truth from love.

Most important of all we must not fool ourselves .. we have to be very aware and discerning in the moment by moment awareness of what is true in our hearts. Not as a mental concept of what is true but truly feeling and acting from our hearts and getting feedback as we get better at discerning what this means.

We will know we are on the right track when we feel happy, free, light, and harmonious and in right relations with ourselves and others around us. There’s no perfect process but there is a need for exploration to discover this truth.